Dearest Friends,
I survived. Yes, last week was Jesus Camp 2011. But instead of the dramatic anecdote I posted last year about that fucking insane God Glitter/Jesus Juice fat bastard, I"ll be brief about this one.
This year's preacher was just as obese, just as annoying, but not as fucking nuts. He was just more of an asshole. This time instead of saying ridiculous things about angel feathers and glory dust, this man just spent three days telling kids how disgusting and pathetic they are, and how they're banned from basically existing according to the Bible. Craziest thing he said: "Hanna Montana is a tool of Satan!" ... Actually, I kind of agree with that one.
But he was nuts. He apparently loves the book of Leviticus, which says everything is an abomination unto God. He's nuts. He calls drinking and tattoos a sin. I know Christians who drink and have tattoos. And Jesus drank, for fuck's sake! His argument: "It could have been grape juice..." FUCK YOU. He turned water into wine.... He actually gave people alcohol. This guy is nuts.
What annoyed me most, however, is how he shamed people. He is a proud, raised-Christian 26 year old virgin, non-drinker, non-anything pretty much. You know what? This dude is just SO DAMN BITTER that he deprives himself of BASIC HUMAN NEEDS.... that he can't stand the fact that others do. Like 'If I'm not gonna have sex, neither will you... HAHAHAHAHAHA!!'
He basically convinced kids that being sexually aroused is wrong, thinking about anything sexual is wrong, if you have CDs or books, or ANYTHING really, that doesn't "glorify God"... you need to set that shit on fire.
Oh, but sex within marriage is great! In fact, it's a form of worship to God... It's a spiritual act!!! Literally. He stated that people can catch curses from sex just like STDs... Wow. I imagine Satan traveling through a guy's dick, being squirted out into your cavity of choice... Pathetic. What the FUCK is this guy smoking. This is ridiculous even for a Christian. And sex as an act of worship?! The LAST thing people think about during sex is praising Jeebus...
So here we are again. Some asshole telling the next generation of kids to be ashamed of their bodies and desires. Making them think that everything in this world is sinful, evil, and will kill them. This dude belongs in the 16th century... Actually, farther back... His morality is archaic, like fucking Bronze Age shit.
Ridiculous. Pisses me off. How people can listen to assholes like this guy.
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